Things have been heating
up here in China. We are
approaching the end of the semester, my sitemate is working through his final
paperwork before leaving me as 外教1, (the number
1 foreign teacher), and summer has definitely arrived. When cooking one day, I made the
mistake of opening a window without a screen, and a fly managed to sneak
in. In honor of this home invasion, I’ve decided to write a poem
to my new roommate.
Mr. Fly,
Try to remember, you’re not an invited guest,
You snuck into my house as an unwanted pest,
I’d like you to leave, please don’t stay and rest,
Go back the way you came, I think that would be
best.
Why are you staying, don’t you miss your home?
You’re the only fly here, why aren’t you alone?
I’ll leave the window open so that you can roam,
And just this once consider please throwing me a
bone.
Where do you get off!?! Inviting friends to stay!
Now there’s 3 of you, if we vote you’d get your
way.
But this isn’t a democracy, we’re in China today.
The government says that my way IS the highway.
Stop tapping the glass, I know you want to leave
I’ll help you if you’ll listen, I need you to
believe
I want the same thing you do, we can both be
relieved
UGH! You’re not a pet, you’re just a peeve.
If only we could talk, I’d tell you what I know.
I’d give you the directions and tell you where to
go
I’d tell you glass is solid, even though it doesn’t
show
Your friend starved to death yesterday, and soon you’ll follow.
Things have changed now, my broom was once your
friend
Guiding you to the window, it is now your final end
I was nice for a while, now it’s your turn to bend
Let’s see if you break, when all your organs blend!
This is really not my style, I promise I’m not mean
It’s just that abuse of hospitality is not at all
my scene
You’ve taught me a lot too, and from all that I’ve seen
I know that next time, I’ll be sure to use the screen.
